Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Turn Ons

What turns you on? This question can be interpreted many different ways, but the core is, what reaches you? What lights your fire, motivates you, and propels you? When you are feeling out of touch, frustrated, or stagnant, what tickles your fancy and brings you back to animated life?
I'm only beginning to discover the answer to this question in my own life. I'm nearly forty years old and it had never occurred to me until recent years that I, too, am entitled to find my passions in life. No one told me otherwise, but I was so busy people pleasing that I took no real time finding out what made me tick. I could spout lists of things my husband enjoyed, identify the things my parents relished, and, of course, bring pleasure to my children being so tapped into their psyche, but I could not find a way to fill an hour by myself that turned me on completely.
No everyone suffers the condition I'm writing about. Many hum along life merrily completely attuned to their likes and passions. Their 'free time' spent in happy pursuits, living peacefully with themselves. I envy them. Even now, with the personal growth I've attained, I can still be blindsided by the simple question, "What do YOU want to do?" I have interests, likes, and desires, but I have a difficult time prioritizing, taking time, and honoring them. Plus, I'm not always sure I've found all of my turn ons in life. As a stay-at-home mother to three dependent children, it is nearly impossible to single out time to dedicate to discovering all of myself. I'm not complaining, truly I'm not. I adore the life I'm living and wouldn't change it for the world. It just strikes me how out of touch I can be with my own self.
I do believe our turn ons change over time. I used to be passionate about scrapbooking. I wasn't a professional by any means, but I enjoyed the creative outlet and the journaling of special times with my family added to pictures. Now the prospect overwhelms me. I am so behind on albums, printing out pictures, and organizing years of stored souvenirs that I'm in shutdown mode. Instead of inspiring me it is dragging me down! I know, then, that this is not a good outlet for me currently. On the flip side, I'd been away from writing for so long but in recent years have been able to proudly and contentedly bring that back to my life! Exercise, which used to terrify and depress me, now enriches me, giving me strength, stamina, and energy. Taking time to laugh watching stand up comedy (at home on the television) with my husband turns me on. I enjoy the shared laugh and time spent together. The same with watching movies together.
I'd like to travel more but know that will have to wait until the economy recovers (and our coffers) and the children are older. Europe is high on my list of places to explore, but so is most of our great United States. I haven't even thought about South America, Australia, Asia or Africa! I think part of my wanderlust involves wanting to travel with a journal to provide new content, experiences, and sights to write about!
My children revive me immensely! Perhaps trite, but so true. I actually like my children. Of course I love them, but I truly like them, too. I enjoy their personalities, their senses of humor, and their compassionate natures. My kids can annoy me like no other people on the planet, but that's human nature and I'll take that with the rest because the rest is so very worth it!
My husband turns me on. He is intelligent, smart, witty, sexy, honest, loyal, multi-faceted and multi-dimensional. He has myriad interests, is handy around the house, in the garage, and other places! And he is constantly reinventing himself. The race car driver persona has been on hiatus for a while, but that is one of my favorite parts to witness of my husband!
I have a lot of work to do to find all of my turn ons in life. Luckily there is no deadline. As my life continues to change so can my passions. I am getting to know myself more each day and year - one of the benefits of aging that people do not celebrate enough.  Like other parts of my life I blog about, this is a journey, one that I have much to gain.
What are your turn ons! Don't hold back, I can take it!


  1. YOU... turn me on.

    The way that you write, handle our children, clean the house, read a book, glance over a magazine, do the dishes, shovel snow, drive a car, make a phone call, stand at the bus-stop, talk to me, watch TV, teach our children, heck - teach anyone's children, write a blog, answer an email, and myriad other things that you do... turn me on.

    Oh yeah... and driving a racecar. That turns me on, too.

  2. Well... Things that make me go "Oh yeah" include good coffee, good book, interesting music. Used to be playing guitar, and once in a long while I pick it up and have a bit of fun but it doesn't captivate me the way it once did.

    Bikes - mainly bicycles - hold my fascination. Taking parts and building one up is a Zen-like activity. Riding I enjoy, sometimes long road rides, sometimes dirt trail adventuring, sometimes a wuick jaunt. And recently I found I like racing.

    My family is a big source of rejuvinating energy. Hanging out with my boys, plaing with the grandkids. My beautiful bride also. After 20+ years together it feel like we are once again becoming the giddy kids we used to be sometimes. She is fantastic.

  3. Research, Animation and Film Making I love the process a cycle of ignorance during research, bliss recording or drawing the material and editing it all into something viewable and then seeing a project complete for the first time is an amazing mix of enlightenment and euphoria, apart from racing or driving cross country for a couple of hours and maybe blogging there is nought quite like it :-)

  4. Great responses, Gentlemen! I am so pleased!! Thank you, Racer, I am touched to my core. xoxox

    Add to my list things I forgot at 5 in the morning: Jewelry (a lifelong passion), music, theater (especially musicals), Hallmark Keepsake ornaments, Christmas, and Barbie Dolls. I reserve the right to post more throughout the day.

  5. Oh, and cultivating my online relationships!

  6. The first thing that came to mind was the thought of a color fan deck. You know those HUGE skinny "books" that decorators carry around with all the color chips in it? That thing makes me absolutely giddy. To me there are infinite possibilities in that thing. I enjoy decorating, although I have no delusions that I'm proficient. Most of my ideas get stolen from other designers then tweaked to suit our needs. But the process of planning, shopping, placing, finishing and enjoying the final project is exciting. Unfortunately, for my husband, I also get bored very quickly with my surroundings and if the budget allowed, I would have already redone my kitchen, family room and the kids bonus room. ;) Not to mention repaint all of the entryway, downstairs hallway, the stairway and the upstairs hallways!! Whew! Hmm... where IS my fan deck anyway? (btw, we've only been in our house for 6 years).

    Similar to decorating. Purging and organizing a pantry, dresser or closet. I even get excited when I hear that others have done it for themselves! It is a sickness, I think. LOL! After completing a project like that I feel like I've lost weight and that sense of "aaaahhh". Just thinking about it is motivating me to get to my closet to get it straightened up. The beautiful line of shoes by color & season, the clothes hanging by type and color. Work of art, my friend!

    Completing the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer weekends, whether I'm walking or crewing. There is such a sense of accomplishment that comes when crossing the finish line after almost 40 miles and wiping away the last of the tears when closing ceremonies are done. I immediately look to the next year and the possibilities and while the weekends are a bonding experience with other women for the same cause, I hope eventually we'll just walk in celebration of finding a cure.

    This sounds totally silly, but Randy & the Professor... I have saved several podcasts, so if I need a lift or pick me up or just need some R&P, I listen and I feel better.

  7. Laughter, Quirkiness, Music, Creating. These are my turn-ons. The best thing about them is that there are a number of ways in which I can receive my fix.

    Making my wife laugh till she is wiping tears from her eyes, glancing at each other biting our lips as we listen to another one of our daughters life thoughts or our son headbutting everything in site.

    Things that make people unique or doing things that other people might find embarrassing I find interesting. Being uninhibited without being out of control.

    Of course music turns me on and often times I use it to turn me off. There is music for every occasion and it is a passion of mine. I think I delve into as much music as I can because I regret never picking up an instrument and learn to play. I have no music biases and love to talk about music to anyone who listens (as you know, even though time constraints have hindered this lately.)

    My other passion is creativity and creating memories and art any new way I can find. Whether its drawing/sketching, graphic design, or photography I love visual art and could spend countless hours looking through photos and logo designs and advertisements. I've been privileged enough lately to be acknowledged and compensated for my photography, something I never thought could happen. I am trying to be careful however because I have often burned out with my creativeness when I am obligated to get things created as opposed to being able to do it casually.

    Recently, I have noticed my daughter Emmma becoming a very good little artist and I love thinking that she has some of my passion for creating. (She also follows in my footsteps in the fine art of being a smart ass.)

    I think this is a great topic, as I recently hit a milestone birthday and have been reflecting more on where I'm at and where I want to be and this helps bring out some of the good things. Thanks,

    oh, and when my wife wears pigtails in her hair it turns me on. :)

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  9. Woodworking always gave me pleasure. To take a flat piece of wood and turn it into something you can be proud of is a great creative outlet. The technical aspect of figuring out the measurements to make the pieces seamlessly interlock, challenges the mind. Being able to make a mental vision become a reality is also very gratifying.