Wednesday, September 29, 2010

The Art of the Kiss

The first instant of attraction, a first date, and then, finally, the first kiss.

The body stirs, the electricity swirls, and brain functions cease. There is no reason, no logic, nor any judgement, there is just the kiss.

And that kiss usually determines if there will be another kiss, another date, or a search for another altogether.

Invariably we all remember our first kiss, or at least the first kiss with the one we choose to be with currently.

Before there were children, mortgages, bills, work deadlines, and the mundanity of everyday life, there was the intensity of the emotions and passions for one another.

Think back to a time when a greeting kiss was not merely a quick peck but a focused bond formed between the lips. All too often, after years of marriage or monogamy, the kiss gets the far backseat, the third row of the minivans of our lives. Everyone and everything else takes precedent and the act that connected us so strongly gets pushed down the to-do list because it is not as insistent as bosses, runny-nosed children, the president of the PTA, or the dog.

But kissing just might be the way to capture our former greatness and make our relationships sparkle like they once did. Kissing may remind us that we are the people we were attracted to in the beginning of the relationship, the very same sexy, adventurous, vital beings who longed to be near one another and share ourselves.

Although I've been with my husband for twenty-four years, since my freshmen year of high school, I had kissed a few boys in my past.

Kissing was exciting, interesting, fascinating, and not always neat. The boys who chose to kiss me had different techniques, but it wasn't until I met my husband that I found the ideal kisser for me.

For you see, kissing is subjective, but certain empirical facts have been discovered and I'm here to share them.

First it is important to note a kiss is a primitive dance, but one that should not be choreographed. A practiced kiss lacks spontaneity and feels lackluster.

A kiss should be searching but not probing, exploratory but not invasive.

Kisses should run the gamut from soft and sensual to passionate and throbbing. A marriage of lips and tongue, not all or nothing, should be the goal. That balance ought be struck to create ideal kissing.

A kiss should leave you tingly, yearning for more, and aching for the next kiss.

A kiss should warm your soul, make you feel gorgeous, and leave you temporarily paralyzed by the sheer chemistry involved.

Kisses should make you forget about the dinner burning on the stove, the garbage that needs to be taken out, the grocery list, the term paper, or the client that needs the callback.

Kissing should be a mini-vacation that offers complete serenity and a rush of raw emotion.

We should take a page from high school students and let our passions take the wheel occasionally.

Of course, being adults we have to keep our emotions in check, our priorities straight, and our passions caged through most of our day, but if we got back to the art of the kiss, we may just find the world, our world, is a much more tolerable place with wonderful moments to look forward!

Do you dare kiss and tell? Have a kissing story to share? Disagree with this blog or endorse it whole-heartedly? Can't believe I wrote about THIS?! Then step up and leave your comments below. I'd love to read what YOU think about kissing!


  1. Do you dare kiss and tell? No, Have a kissing story to share? No, Disagree with this blog or endorse it whole-heartedly? Absolutely Endorsed :-)

  2. As usual, very well written. And not just provocative but more thought-provoking.
    And my bride has the most wonderful kisses.

  3. The first kiss with my husband was at the altar of our wedding. 'Nuff said. ;)

  4. Never kiss and tell... not if you want a second one. Your words will make me look at kissing in a new, refreshing light. You got my positive vote on this one :-}
    Sounds like you guys will be enjoying the next 24 years too. Good for you.

  5. ahhh, the kiss, such a magical wonderful thing if properly revered that can ignite fires, set the soul to stirring and set the body to tingling with anticapation, can impart encouragement, lend strength and say I love you without words, but in the lips of someone who lacks the understanding of all a kiss can be the kiss can become a lackluster affair, a meeting devoid of emotion, a perfunctory act with no meaning, a cold an unwanted thing, while I don't kiss and tell I do wholeheartedly endorse the subject matter of your blog

  6. Great blog Chief! You're right, there is nothing like a good kiss!

  7. I remember my first kiss like it was yesterday. I couldn't figure out how to breathe, so I just held my breath until it was over. It was pretty amazing though. Can't remember the girls name though.
    Great blog Chief. Keep up the great writing...

  8. What an awesome blog, I feel that way everytime I kiss my wife. Heart soaring lost in her love.

  9. You have touch on a subject I think about often. If anyone were to ask me what I miss most about dating I would tell them I miss the kissing. All the passion that is in the kiss in the first months of dating, when that is all that you share between you and the rest is just imagination. So true that each person has their individual style, but once you find the one you are passionate for then the world opens up and the butterflies in your stomach being to dance.

  10. To myself kissing is like a shot of healing sunshine. :-)

  11. Oh yes Candice my friend,kissing is really art and when can do it like never before,it shivers whole body,but not with every one,have to have mutual chemistry:)

  12. I dont have words to say..seriously..I agree with everything you said above. That was a different move from your side Candice. U really explored the "Art Of Kiss" real deep down!! This post really took me to an ultimate pleasureful journey. Hmmmmm!!!

    And make-outtttt!! Thats it!! Whooooooooooooooo!!

  13. Thank you. We have been together 10 years and while reading this i was trying to think back to our last kiss. not the daily peck on the lips saying good by, but a real kiss. I don't have the best of memories,but i should be able to remember that,,and i can't. That is sad. but correctable. If you ask me at the end of today,i will have an answer for when was our last kiss..and i know that familiar feeling you speak of is right there as well. thanks candice,,

  14. I do! I do! I first kissed my husband in 8th grade. I remember it whole heartedly. I remember feeling dizzy and tingly all over. It was then I knew we were soul mates. However, we did not stay together since then, so I've kissed many a man in between 8th grade and senior year when my husband and I reconnected. The kisses we share now still leaving me yearning for more! Thanks for sharing this and bringing me back to a place of lots of memories =)