Autumn Appetites

A stiff breeze whips around the home, a flurry of leaves create a mini cyclone outside the window, and you are glad you put the extra blanket on the bed. Getting out of the cocoon you created in that bed is tortuous as it is delightfully warm but the ambient temperature in the house is cool. The promise of a hot shower, a cozy sweater, and a steamy cup of coffee or tea allows you to venture forth. You have started another spectacular autumn day.

Yesterday pumpkin picking was on the agenda with my family. This tradition is looked forward to each and every year by the children and their parents alike. But before such an adventure is embarked upon, breakfast needed to fuel up and rev the engines of my family. What to make on a crisp fall day? Pumpkin Cinnamon Pancakes! This recipe comes from Sandra Lee Semi-Homemade Cooking. Sandra Lee was made famous by The Food Network. Her philosophy is cooking can be delicious, reasonable, and simple if you utilize several pre-packaged foods, add a few fresh ingredients, and tie it all up with "a pinch of this with a hint of that".  Here is the recipe for her pumpkin cinnamon pancakes, a perennial favorite in the 187 household.

Pumpkin Cinnamon Pancakes

Pancakes:

1  cup buttermilk pancake mix, Aunt Jemima

2/3 cup cold water

1/3 cup canned pumpkin, Libby's (Do not use pumpkin pie filling)

1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon, McCormick

1/8 teaspoon ground ginger, McCormick

Nonstick vegetable cooking spray, Pam

Butter, room temperature, Land O' Lakes

Prep Time:         5 minutes

Cooking Time:   6 minutes

Pecan Syrup:

1 cup maple flavored pancake syrup,  Log Cabin Original Syrup

5 tablespoons pecans, toasted and chopped, Diamond

Pecan Syrup Preparation:

Combine maple syrup and pecans in a small microwave-safe bowl. Heat in microwave on high, about 25 seconds. Set pecan syrup aside and keep warm.

Pancake Preparation:

In a medium bowl, whisk pancake mix, water, pumpkin, cinnamon, and ginger until just blended (do not overmix; mixture should be lumpy).

Spray a heavy griddle with nonstick spray and heat griddle over medium heat.

Spoon 2 tablespoons of batter onto griddle to form each pancake.

Cook for 2 minutes or until bubbles appear, then turn pancakes over and cook for 2 minutes longer. Transfer pancakes to plates. Top with butter and serve with warm pecan syrup.

In my household, I am the only person who likes the pecan syrup so I just make an individual serving and put the plain syrup on the table. We do not use butter on our pancakes (I know, blasphemy for some of you). I do not use all of the brand names called for because they may have sponsored her book, but they don't sponsor my trips to the local grocery store! But I do use this recipe every autumn for many a Sunday morning breakfast. I usually double or even triple the recipe, make my extra pancakes and freeze them for another morning when we are rushing around but still want a decadent breakfast. I always serve some breakfast meat with these pancakes to add some protein; either brown and serve sausages or fresh bacon.

This blog, like the weather, changes focus. Today is about sharing the autumn recipes you and your family loves. Do you make the best apple pie, a scrumptious pumpkin bread, or an outrageous stuffing? Is your cranberry relish renowned? Share your favorite here and provide us all with something new to add to the family table. My autumn appetite is up for it!

Friday Music Blog

Welcome back to the weekly installment of the Friday Music Blog. I've had great success over the years with this series and am thrilled to be running it here at this site.

Today's focus is your favorite power ballad. These are the songs that traditionally hard rockin', metal, or any kind of rock band played that had a "softer side". The songs usually had a lovely melody and some kind of guitar licks in the middle. The 1980s were particularly ripe with these types of songs, although they certainly were not the only decade.  Each generation has created these drippy, saccharin sweet, and musically powerful ballads. Dig through your music collection, think back to your high school homecoming dance and the tunes that were playing for that slow dance, and list all that come to mind. What a fun way to springboard into this gorgeous Autumn weekend.

If you can't get enough of the Friday Music Blog and cannot wait until next week's edition, log on to my other site at Rowdy.com and leave your comments on my other Friday Music Blog. I offer two topics each and every Friday!

Thank you in advance for all of your selections. Total participation makes this blog so much fun so please get to typing!

Defying Gravity

Music has been my friend and constant companion since I was a child. When I was happy, sad, scared, lonely, in love or suffering in love, music has been there to offer mood enhancement, safety, and acknowledgement of my emotions. I've always been profoundly moved by music. Even as a small girl a piece of music could move me to tears. I am still that way.
Be it song content, the artist's talent, or a memory attached to the piece, music has a grip on me. When I discover a song that reaches me I become obsessed and feel compelled to listen constantly, learn the lyrics, and have it soak into my soul.
Currently there are two songs that I am "gaga" over:  Glee's cover of Lady GaGa's "Poker Face" sung by Idina Menzel and Lea Michele and, from the Broadway show Wicked, Idina Menzel singing "Defying Gravity". Not only am I drawn to these two numbers, but I find the common thread - Idina Menzel. I am a fan of Rent and became aware of this talented woman on that soundtrack. Recently, because of Glee (a television show about a high school glee club), Idina Menzel came back into my listening world and I find her voice even more powerful and intoxicating. With a little stop on Youtube I found her performing "Defying Gravity" and was a goner. This song speaks to me so loudly and plainly. For years I've been wanting to do something of note, to break out of the ordinary and write. With dozens of unfinished projects, a string of incompletes, and a mountain of excuses I was going nowhere as a writer. When I discovered my husband's favorite NASCAR site in the Spring of 2007, Rowdy.com, I took my first giant leaps into the realm of writing. Blogging opened up a brand new wonderful world for me to exercise my creative mind. What started out as NASCAR/racing-related blogs soon blossomed into much more personal accounts. I still love the work I do there and the people I associate with at that site. But I began to truly "defy gravity" when I started this blog site. Putting my name on the title, having the ultimate freedom to write about anything and everything that is on my mind, makes me feel like the tethers that had held me down have been cut! Writing daily has energized me and made me, even in this short time, a better wife, mother, friend, and person. By facing my fears, insecurities and character flaws on a public forum, I am forced to deal with them head on and learn from them. Having a readership who interacts with me allows me camaraderie, a sounding board, a cheerleading squad, and a ever-growing community of my own. Being a stay-at-home mom can be very isolating and sharing my life in this forum has made that role infinitely easier to do and appreciate.
This topic may even become a series. The music that has influenced me over the years is a topic that I'm selfishly interested in exploring. And with each week/theme, I'm interested in reading about the music that has affected you in the different stages of your life. As is evident by the outpouring of responses to the Friday Music Blogs I post, music is important to many of you. Let me know what music inspires you to personal greatness like "Defying Gravity" does for me.

Forgiveness

Forgiveness was a concept I could totally wrap my brain around. I could be omnipotent and forgive all those who trespassed against me and I would free them of their suffering. It was an easy gift to give requiring little thought on my part and what I perceived as my magnanimous heart.

But I'm realizing that forgiveness is far more complicated in its simplicity.

First, I was always requiring an apology from a person before I forgave him or her. I wanted, required, the person to feel genuine remorse for how they had tread on me. Once that was offered I swooped in and generously offered my "forgiveness" in return. While waiting for the initial apology I would sit and stew recounting how the person had hurt, embarrassed, shamed, or abused me.

By this action I was allowing the events to affect me again and again until the apology was finally issued and I was then able to forgive.

Now I'm learning that forgiveness need not have anything to do with apologies, but a single act on my part to release the hurt and allow it to go. It has all to do with me and nothing to do with anyone else.

I alone have the power to move on and unburden myself of these feelings that keep me in an emotional jail.

Second, forgiveness does not mean forgetting. But in remembering I do not need to continue to beat myself up for the infraction of another. Remembering offers a chance to stay connected to a lesson learned and an opportunity to grow from that lesson.

Forgiveness allows distance from the hurt, understanding, and a chance to move on with increased knowledge. Forgiveness enlightens and lightens.

Finally, forgiveness is not only about another person. Until I learned forgiveness needed to be doled out to myself I was a very unhappy person. From childhood through the present I blamed myself for different abuses, calamities, and unpleasantness.

Whether a victim, a witness, or the cause of unhappiness, I held on to the pain and suffering and used those hurts to continue to torture myself. I could forgive many in my life, but I never offered myself the same gift.

And now I'm learning that forgiveness needs to begin within. Like love, if you cannot love/forgive yourself, how can you love/forgive others?

My husband lives by a strong moral code and I admire him for the serenity he's able to stay connected to for the majority of the time. Among his many beliefs is, "don't let people take up space in your head who don't pay you rent".

If someone has wronged, annoyed, hurt, or betrayed you, let it go. Forgive them. That may not change who they are, but it changes how you deal with them.

Forgive and move on allowing peace and serenity to move in replacing hurt and misery.

I'm learning to forgive for my own health and sanity. I'm learning that in order to forgive others I must first forgive myself.

Forgiveness is not forgetting but an opportunity to move on with increased knowledge.

And forgiveness, in all of its simplistic glory, is the catalyst to a happier, healthier life.

Join me in taking the first steps in earnest forgiveness.

Anger

I have a problem with anger. All too often I let anger get the best of me. I allow those around me to trigger my anger rather than learn to "unplug". Anger renders me irrational, loud, and curt. My blood pressure boils over and I fume. I do not like feeling this way and I want to change.
Anger has a place in our lives. When we are wronged, ignored, misunderstood, or crossed maliciously anger is the proper response. What I object to is how anger takes over my sensible brain for far too long a sojourn. I need to learn how to express my feelings in a more precise, rational format so as to use my anger constructively and not harmfully.
When I try to dig deeper and look what causes the anger, I typically find there is more going on in me. Usually I am scared and feeling helpless or overwhelmed in my situation. When I feel powerless I turn to the powerful blast of anger that seems to clear a path, but actually just leaves a wake of hurt and sadness. I'm learning that to break this unhealthy response, I need to empower myself.
Usually I hang on to guilt and "fault". "I'm sorry" is my mantra and "it's all my fault" is constantly falling out of my mouth. This "martyr syndrome" is self prescribed and so very counter-productive. Those around me whom I care for and about are individuals capable of leading their own lives and taking responsibility for their own actions. When I surrender to the fact that I cannot change others, I can only change my reactions to them, I will be in a healthier place. The only person I can change is me. I need to do the work needed to make my own happiness, live healthfully, and allow others to succeed or fail without attaching their victories and defeats to my self-esteem.
I'm not foolish enough to think that anger should be eradicated. I do feel anger can be a positive in certain situations. That anger can be a catalyst to communication and ultimately to change. But I know the anger I am expressing is often misplaced, wholly too intense, and frightfully raw. As I am a parent and thus a teacher to the younger generation, I need to learn how to reign in my anger, express it more appropriately, and model ways to communicate effectively the reasons for my displeasure. Tall orders when I'm "seeing red", but vastly important to providing a healthy environment for my family.
With a shaky economy, long-term marriage, three children, a home always needing repair, and the stresses those elements bring, I've taken to the shortcut anger provides rather than take the time to examine why my life seems spiraling out of control at times. When I take a few minutes to decompress and explore my emotions I find that these stressors are real, but they are manageable.
Most who see me would not imagine I have an "issue" with anger. To that I simply reply, I am human. What I have going for me is the willingness to change and the notion that things are out of kilter. I'm finding outlets to work on this "character flaw" and am making huge inroads. Anger will always have a place in my life, but I will not let it define me nor will I allow it to dictate. I am working toward embracing the power within to live a more contented and healthy life. Care to join me?

Family Ties

They are leaving today, my parents. Each June they arrive from Florida and stay in their summer lake house, a mere 7 minutes away from me, and stay until the autumn leaves begin to change colors. Today is departure day. They've been with us in the house the last week so they could spend more time with their grandchildren and it's been great. And it hasn't. It is difficult to have house guests when the school year has begun. Schedules are disrupted, children don't want to go to school because they "might miss something fun", and behaviors become unusual.
I am the guilty party when it comes to altered behaviors. I adore my parents and have a terrific relationship with them. It is stressful, however, to have them live with me for an extended period. Being the middle generation (parents above you/children below) is an exhausting station, at least the way I handled it this week. I tried to be "every woman" and that just left me burned out. I need to remember more to simply live and enjoy and not let little stressors get in the way of my ultimate happiness. I spent so much of yesterday in a bad mood. Nothing seemed to go the way I had planned/visualized in my head. I was holding on to expectations, frustrated by my own limitations, annoyed with a cranky baby who would not nap, and holding myself back from joy. All the while I knew these were the last hours to spend quality time with my parents who I will not see until December for Christmas. It wasn't until the late afternoon that I exhaled, literally and figuratively, and was able to sit back and enjoy the family ties that I belong. My mother, nursing a terrible cold, never complaining but obviously suffering, enjoys music. I logged on to Youtube and found several of her all-time favorite songs performed by the original artists she enjoys. This delighted her to no end and even made her cry because she simply loves the music. I found I react to music in much the same way. I saw the family tie yesterday and that was a priceless gift I was able to see when I relaxed. Later my father and I ran to the local Chinese take out for dinner. As we waited for the order we shared serious conversation about life. When you are the youngest of three children it is nice to have alone time with your dad! When we arrived home we shared a delicious and fun dinner with the family, including my newly divorced brother who may be leaving the state in the near future. We ate, laughed, talked, and lingered long after my children were excused from the table. Later that night, after the children were tucked into bed, including the cranky baby, I stayed up far too late to watch television with my parents (Mad Men). These are the memories I will take with me moving forward. The impromptu dinners, casual and not associated with holidays or birthdays, are the ones that will stick out in my mind's eye and connect me to my family. Quality time spent one-on-one with my folks that energizes me and strengthens our ties. I can beat myself up for wasting so much of the day with my terrible attitude, but this is counter-productive. At least I ended the day in a good mood making lasting memories.

So as I send them on their way I once again have a heavy heart and wish I could turn back the clock. But my clock ticks relentlessly. I am looking forward to normalcy reigning once again, but there is that part of me, the child within, who is sad and lonely and already missing her family ties.

Friday Music Blog

Sell me on your current five favorite songs. These songs may be old-time favorites, a mix of contemporary and classic hits, or any combination as long as they are your musical passion right now. The music can come from any genre and you can like the piece for any reason, but TELL the reasons you'd pick these five songs. Really convince me that these songs are awesome and I'd be a fool not to check them out! The music blog is only as successful as those who participate make it. Do not worry if you are not a "writer", just write what you feel! Spelling and grammar do not count on the Friday Music Blog! So please leave your response below to what your current five favorite songs are.